KALIAKRA ROCK FEST 2009 - SCORPIONS, Blind Guardian, Edguy

02.07.2009, Kavarna, 'Kaliakra' stadium

words byВ Vassil Varbanov, photo: Dankisha

Engilsh version coming soon

В "Where the hell am I?" are the very first words to come out of my mouth upon waking up in the morning. "Your Highness is presently in Kavarna," answers a grinning Castaneda without an ounce of guilt in his bloodshot eyes. Three push-ups later I'm finally able to answer him: "How can we be in Kavarna, when our hotel is in Balchik, you mong?"
- "Whatever, it's the same area, sort of. I can't remember much of last night anyway, apart from doing carwheels in front of the candy vendor. Oh, and Home Sweet Home. That Tommy Lee's dead cool, eh? Good morning, by the way"
- "It ain't morning, dude, it's 1 p.m. in the afternoon."
- "Oh come off it, at a festival like this, the day after the Crue, 1p.m. is practically early morning. I can crow if you like."
- "Not right now please!" I snap back as memories of the previous night come flooding back to me - his drunken neighing, wailing and what he described as "the dirge of the hummingbird" caused passers-by to look on in astonishment and drew unwelcome attention from the local police. I mean, the guy definitely has a gift for imitating animal noises. Why did we have to take him with us!

He must have slept the entire night with the air conditioning on, since his head seems to constantly be tilting to the right. This enables him to spot a small helicopter, parked opposite the beach restaurant where we sit enjoying a cappuccino.
- "I've got a wicked idea - let's nick that helicopter. Then we can take photos of the Scorpions from above and play Wagner to them, seeing asВ  it's all German metal tonight!"
- "By the way, mate, " a clearly irritated Ahmed butts in, "there's a few new films out there as well, you know. Why not try updating your filmography?"
He then dryly infroms us that he's off to some cocktail bar on a beach down South.
"You don't expect me to endure another night here, do you? 30+ years of the Scorpions and David Hasselhoff is about as much as I can take," adds he of the Jitball (Tangra Mega Rock's sports show) merry crew and storms off without even saying goodbye. Ahmet must be in a real hurry - once he's off, he never looks back, not once. Which is just as well since his BMW goes up to 50 mph within the first few 10 seconds of him hitting the ignition. It's no wonder that two years ago our dear Ahmet made Blind Guardian vocalist Hansi Kursch's hair stand on end by covering the distance from the venue which BG were due to perform at, to our studio (where we were expecting Hansi for an interview) for a mere ten minutes when most others would have taken at least forty. . Anyway, Ahmet dusappears in the distance, leaving a diesel fog in his wake.
At this point Castaneda clears his throat, attempting to draw ouir attention back to his wild helicopter-hijacking plan, but I quickly intervene:
"Ahmet's talking bollocks. Tonight's gig is well worth seeing, especially since we're here anyway."
Ahmet is only one of a group of others who decide to give tonight's show a miss and instead head for the South coast where the climate's much warmer. This means that only three of us will be attending the second festival night. There's me - going just for the fun of it, Dankisha, who'll be snapping away with her camera and the charming Casraneda, who will, of course, do nothing more than get obnoxiously drunk and be a pain in the ass. I doubt the Scorpions will be fazed by the absence of Ahmet and his chums though. They've got thousands of adoring fans as it is.

We arrive at the stadium at 4:10 p.m. to witness the first contingent of Scorpions fanatics impatiently waiting outside, ready for that mad dash to the front once the doors open. The heat is unbearable! It's no wonder then that Blind Guardian request that all their press interviews be conducted inside the air conditioned comfort of their dressing rooms backstage. Lead guitarist Andre has wisely opted to stay behind at the band's hotel under the pretext that he's caught the flu or something. As we speak he's most probably enjoying a cold beer while flipping through the satellite channels on his tv. Hansi has cut his hair very short, which makes me almost choke on my ice tea (not that cold anymore) in shock and surprise. He reveals that he only did it to look like me. Regardless, it takes me a while to come to terms with this new fashion statement of his, as it clearly makes him look like an apprentice geography teacher. Fredi and Marcus are clearly enjoying the good weather as they're off to Metal Camp in Slovenia next, where the forecast says: heavy showers.

The future Right Said Fred?

After the "Krefeld Bards" have fulfilled their press obligations, Hansi suggests that me and him should have our photo taken together, to capture this "shorthaired" moment in time. It's only at the eighth attempt that I realize it'd be a good idea to actually remove my baseball cap. Remind me later to tell you something about Klaus Meine's caps.
Next we meet up with Edguy, who seem a bit worried, as part of their luggage has got lost at the airport and they're not entirely sure whether they'll be getting it back in time for their show. It's not a matter of lost toothbrushes or underwear, you see - it's their stage backdrop that's gone missing. We commiserate. Edguy's tour manager Jorg was in Sofia only a few months ago, with Hammerfall. This means we know everyone backstage - a Nuclear Blast family of sorts. Only Peter the Wizard chose to stay behind in Sofia, offering some lame excuse. Edguy deal very efficiently with the media, despite or maybe because of the fact that their lead singer doesn't give any interviews at all.

В 

After the "Krefeld Bards" have fulfilled their press obligations, Hansi suggests that me and him should have our photo taken together, to capture this "shorthaired" moment in time. It's only at the eighth attempt that I realize it'd be a good idea to actually remove my baseball cap. Remind me later to tell you something about Klaus Meine's caps.
Next we meet up with Edguy, who seem a bit worried, as part of their luggage has got lost at the airport and they're not entirely sure whether they'll be getting it back in time for their show. It's not a matter of lost toothbrushes or underwear, you see - it's their stage backdrop that's gone missing. We commiserate. Edguy's tour manager Jorg was in Sofia only a few months ago, with Hammerfall. This means we know everyone backstage - a Nuclear Blast family of sorts. Only Peter the Wizard chose to stay behind in Sofia, offering some lame excuse. Edguy deal very efficiently with the media, despite or maybe because of the fact that their lead singer doesn't give any interviews at all.

The front of house PA offers us choice moments from Deep Purple's ‘Battle Rages On’...twice. Edguy's backdrop never arrives, so they take to the stage without it. Midway through their show, vocalist Tobi shares news of this unfortunate incident with the crowd and tells everyone to avoid Austrian Airlines because "they Suck!".This is greeted by loud cheering, laughter and general mirth from the masses below, as if they all worked for British Airways (you never know, plenty of people with Asian complexions in this audience).

Tobi is one hell of a frontman! He may not be the tallest person on earth, but he sure knows how to rise to the occasion and work a crowd. The first 50 or so rows go mental. ‘Tears of a Mandrake’ is greeted by a sea of raised hands, as is ‘Superheroes’.
"We're going now, but don't you worry," says Tobi, "it's fucking German heavy metal rock'n'roll night! Blind Guardian will be on after us and then, if you stick around, you'll get to see the Scoprions - the biggest German metal band ever!"
Of course he knows we'll ALL "stick around" for the headliners

After Edguy leave the stage we're treated to some Van Halen and Judas Priest from the PA - a slight breach in the German-dominated soundsape of tonight. "Wild nights...hot and crazy days...I'm feeling good tonight..."
Then it's time for Blind Guardian. I'm a bit worried about Castaneda. He's nowhere to be seen and this could spell trouble - not for Castaneda, but for anyone within a yard of him. Off I go to look for him at the front, where I suspect he may be lurking, feeling up unsuspecting girls in the general chaos. On my way there I run into a burly German tour bus driver. The same guy who drove Ministry's bus to Sofia last year. Like I said, we're one big metal family. Apparently Hans fell victim to some very foul play from a local resident while he was taking a nap behind the wheel at a parking lot in Kavarna. Having left his window half-open, Hans was conmpletely knocked out by sleepy gas, after which he was relieved of all his cash, credit cards and passport. Aaah, the glamour of life on the road with a rock'n'roll band!

I finally make my way to the front where I notice that Blind Guardian haven’t got a backdrop either. In any case Hansi’s a sharp dresser. His attire may not be too fantasy-inspired, but the music certainly sounds good. People look mighty impressed and some are transfixed. At this point the crowd is twice the size of yesterday’s. About 80% of hands that go up in the air brandish yellow bracelets, which you get if you buy a three-day ticket for the festival. This explains some of the more passive elements in the audience during Motley Crue’s show – they only went to that gig because they could.  

В 

Blind Guardian’s gig is an entirely different matter. The audience applauds as if they’re at a classical music concert. It’s an epic experience. During ‘Traveler In Time’ the Scorpions and their entourage slip unnoticed into the backstage area. You won’t see anyone dancing while Blind Guardian are onstage – people are mesmerized by the spectacle and prefer to stand still and watch. There IS one girl, about a 100 feet from centre-stage, performing wild choreography with her arms, sat astride her boyfriend’s shoulders.

Backstage some security guys are getting their pics taken with Edguy. The band don’t seem to mind. I mean they can’t really say no to a bunch of stocky males, can they? Meanwhile Blind Guardian’s has finished and what seems to be a stadium-rock compilation blares out of the PA. We’re treated to “anthems” from Loverboy, REO Speedwagon, Motley Crue (which yet again fail to excite the masses), Cinderella, Dave Lee Roth and Aerosmith. The warm reaction to ‘Love In An Elevator’ must have had the festival promoters plotting  how to bring the famous Boston quintet to these parts.
Is it me or is it getting really crowded in here? There’s even some aunties and grannies – I kid you not. Everyone’s here, but no sign of my mate Castaneda. Dankisha, however, is in the photo pit, ready to start snapping away the moment the kings of German heavy rock appear onstage. Left on my own, I have a few minutes to reflect on what, in my humble opinion, makes this band so successful and special. As I see it, their main strength lies in Klaus Meine’s phenomenal voice, which has the capability and range to rise above the dual Schenker/Jabs guitar blitz and is also a strong piercing magical weapon during ballads. Who cares that it’s been 30 years since we last saw him without any headwear. And then there’s the small matter fo the band being pretty good at writing catchy melodies. Well, that explains the almost sold out stadium then.

В 

And here they come! A series of song titles and video segments run on a giant screen. A guy wearing a Sodom t-shirt is standing next to me. We both jokingly express our disapproval at the bare female breast on display during the “Zoo” segment – there are, after all, plenty of children in the venue as well as diehard punters. I mean, the grannies have bad eyesight, so they won’t notice anyway.  There are two additional screens flanking the stage. No soppy ballads for the first 20 minutes of the Scorps set and then two in a row – ‘Send Me An Angel’ and ‘Holiday’. People are loving every minute!

Why is AC/DC frontman playing guitar for theВ SCORPIONS?В 

Some lanky skinhead, a Balkan version of Telly Savalas, seems to be the only person ill at ease here. He faces a few dilemmas – if he keeps his cap on to show off the Bulgarian national crest on it, no one will be able to see his shaved head. If he keeps his shirt on to show off some more patriotic symbols, then no one will have a clear view of the muscles underneath. He looks relieved when the Scorpions launch into ‘Blackout’, as he clearly thinks this means “blacks out”, but is shocked to find that no one with a darker complexion is leaving the venue, since they obviously have a better grasp of the English language than him.
Sensing an impending onslaught of cigarette lighters, I snake my way towards the front, behind a tall longhaired man in his fifties who’s already trying to whistle ‘Wind of Change’ through a mouthful of buns.  

В 

The crowd sways left and right, while I'm relieved to spot Cashaneda making his way towards me with a couple of beers. I can sense he's getting all emotional to the sounds of ‘Wind Of Change’ Of course he tries to deny this, but I remind him that those were, after all, somewhat romantic times plus we've got the parliamentary elections coming up in a couple of days and bu God do we need the winds of change to blow the current government as far away as possible.

We then go looking for Dankisha, who we find conducting a survey among the fans queueing up for the toilets. Is seems the punters are unhappy about the number of chemical loos, which simply aren't enough to cater for such a large crowd and this is one of the festival's few shortcomings.
As we leave the stadium we see a small crowd assembled outside, obviously too skint ot stingy to buy a ticket. We make haste for the car to avoid the crowds pouring out of the venue and take off for Balchik and a bit of well deserved shut-eye.

GALLERY